Growth in Nature...and in Ourselves

Spring is the time for new growth.  In the above picture, the new growth can be easily seen by the lighter and brighter color green on the end of every branch - most evergreens show their new growth in this way.

Even the tiny forest floor evergreens show how they've grown with the use of color.

How that caught my attention the other day - the fact, that regardless of the environmental conditions (too wet, too dry, just right...), that some growth always occurs.

In upstate NY, we have four distinct seasons. During the winters, the hardwood trees hibernate, as do many mammals, plants, amphibians, insects, etc. - they sleep through the cold dark winter, living off of stores of food gathered during the late summer/fall months when they gorge on what nature provides...

When I'm cutting trees up for firewood (all of them offered by death - whether blown down in a storm, or just those who've succumbed to disease), I like to look at the rings...

The rings on the log represent a visual timeline that tells more than the age of the tree. It shows, through the varied widths, which of those years were good and which were a struggle. It is the outside layer of the tree that grows - each year adding a new outer ring or record of the previous year's growth.

...And as with everything in nature, I like to compare/contrast what occurs in nature with our own human race...and with me.  I have to wonder about my own growth over the years...and how it might be measured.  It's not so much the lines that have become more defined upon my face - the wrinkles that welcome one into the next stage...or the gray hair...or the arthritis beginning to reshape my fingers - no, the growth I seek to measure is a bit deeper...

There have been good years and trying years; years that have included incredible suffering, as well as years that have been the happiest of my life...but each of those years was filled with the building blocks of every life - endless present moments that brought with them opportunities for new growth - opportunities to grow in wisdom - through new experiences, new teachers, and new beginnings.

Sometimes I learned and grew from this lesson or that early on, while other times...I needed to relive a particular lesson over and over until it finally sunk in; and some lessons, perhaps...I'm still struggling with, as I live in a world that too often preaches what "should" be or "might" be, rather than facing the reality of what "is". 

I used to like to use the analogy of the hour glass, as it pertains to life.  The grains of sand in the bottom chamber represent the moments of life gone by.  Some of them were very fruitful, while others were squandered. Some people spend their lives looking down into that chamber - lives that focus upon yesterday's happy times; lives that focus on past transgressions by us or against us - savoring the good old days or wallowing in a poor-me mentality; lives that focus upon "what might have been" had I only done this or that...instead of what I did do.

...Others like to look to the grains of sand that still live in the upper chamber. The young tend to see so many - "I'll live forever and time is in infinite abundance"; others may see too few grains remaining and suffer in facing the end of one's life - even though life has not yet left. In those grains are tomorrow's moments - and they belong to tomorrow, not today.

I've spent some time in each of those mindsets at one time or another during my own life and will probably visit them again in the future, although as long as I only "visit", I'll be alright.

I like to think that the magic resides in only one place at a time - in the grain of sand that is now falling from the upper chamber to the lower chamber. It is the grain that represents the NOW - the present moment, and it asks for our undivided attention.  The present moment is where our power resides.  The present moment is the only time anything and everything has ever occurred, without exception. 

The present moment is our "gift" - our opportunity to grow, in order to expand our current growth ring. When we spend the majority of our time with the grain of sand as it falls from the upper chamber and before it reaches the bottom chamber, we become focused; we become aware; we take control away from a mind who tends to dwell in the past and future; we understand the true concept of being born-again and perhaps most importantly, we maximize our chance for a big fat growth ring.

Falling Awake...

Falling awake - it was part of a Jethro Tull lyric that caught my ear...and mind. 

Not falling asleep - no, that's too normal - too routine - that's what we do when we get into bed each night...and perhaps, what we do when we get into the car each morning...when we finally sit at our desk...when we return the first phone call - we fall asleep; a deep sleep whereby habitual patterns of acting and responding are carried out without much awareness...cruise control in the modern world we've been immersed in.

Perhaps...maybe - fortunately not always...

And so, a topic in my mind, I wrote the title and then placed my fingers on the keyboard and let them roam...and here's where I ended up:

 

Falling Awake

In a dream, I was rubbing my eyes...

   Trying my best to clear what had grown there - a painful stye.

I would see glimpses of what I had missed,

   But opening "my" eyes, burned in the cultural mist.

Then there beside the stream I saw a little waterfall,

   One that had been born from the rains of the night before.

I bent down low and put my head beneath Mother's tears...

   And opened my eyes to let in what so many fear.

Through the falls I saw the green of a new world;

   It was singing a soft song as it danced with the breeze...

      My mind fell into the stream below and in my hand...appeared a key.

A mosquito dipped his reed into my back...

   And I flinched - sending the key flying towards the next moment.

And thinking I'd lost what might never again be found,

   I dove into the rushing stream below...

      The water parted to let me in and we became one...

         I was the key and the key was me...and we fit into the world...

            Yet, only if we find our own eyes...and see.

Downstream I went...no work required...just let go...and flow...

A Clear Path

So often, we spend our time on clear paths...

     paths cut by those who came before.

And most every clear path is maintained by

     "What's Always Been"...in hope of permanence.

          They are pruned and weed-whacked and...

               Too often, devoid of any new growth.

New growth on yesterday's path...yesterday's words,

     Just cannot be tolerated - Heresy!

          And we sink our roots into that soil and breath in deeply...

               And so it goes; or so it seems...to me.

Sometimes I wonder...and sometimes I wander;

     About the world and onto a path not readily traveled.

          And there I find the sprouts and buds of new birth...

               And I have to ponder...before I swing my machete...

Who is it that asks for a clear path anyway?

     Is it a me that my culture grew?

          Is it a we that I lost an old game to?

               Or...is it a mind that finds peace in re-runs?

Today is a new day...as they all are;

     Will I travel the same route to the same places?

If I walk the clear path, then my destination is already known...

     Perhaps...so thinks the mind of Mother Culture.

          A safe and well lit path that gives what our mind seeks;

               The Known - the equilibrium the brain seeks shelter beneath.

But what of that new growth?

     What of those sprouts?

          Seeking nourishment from our shared sun...

               in this new day...this never before lived moment...

What do these sprouts of the new spring offer?

     Should I listen?  Should I dare to listen...and to see?

          Or - do I heed the warnings of those who cling...

               To yesterday's beliefs...to yesterday's promise?

Where does the true promise lie...is it a lie?

     Where do I place my foot next - is it up to me?

          And who is it I think is me?  Is it we?

Into the virgin forest I will walk today,

     And what I will find...will be; and perhaps...

          The me that will see, will find what's never been seen.

Perhaps...maybe...

     Wondering, wandering on or away from

          The Clear Path...once again.

Spider Webs, Gas Lights...and the Mind

Sometimes, it seems that yesterday's light  - a light that once allowed us to see clearly in dark times...has dimmed...or it flickers out of control, and what once acted as a tool that helped us to see...becomes a distraction - a blockage - that prevents us from seeing clearly. 

We feel safe in a well-lit place; it provides a sense of security and well-being. For so many (me included), the dark is a place filled with sounds that we cannot identify; secrets from the realm of the unknown - a place where fear patiently awaits to keep our mind company...perhaps. And in the darkness, the mind creates...and what it creates is fantasy - and minds...cannot distinguish between reality and fantasy.

Lights (whether gas or electric) are mechanical devices - like our brains.  They are filled with switches and pathways, and perhaps most importantly - energy that flows!  Lights (and minds) are both tools created to serve us; to help us see and understand; to help us grow and make sense of what we came to learn and be...or so it seems to me.

If the light is not working properly, then there's always a reason - the energy flow is blocked - why?

I took apart one of my wall gas lights up to our camp this past week because it was not working properly.  For a year it's not worked right and so...I've relied on the only other gas light we have...on the opposite wall. But, having a light that doesn't work is a distraction - and distractions like to find a home in the back of one's mind - always asking for attention...a task that needs to be completed before we can let go and move on - FIX ME!!!

And so, I did a bit of Googling, and found the schematic for the light fixture, and armed with that plan, I took the light apart...

And inside the narrow pipe, through which the propane gas flows, I found a tiny web - a web spun by a spider that long ago abandoned his home.  While the spider was gone, he left behind a barrier to future flow.  It was a lesson for me that the spider left behind - a lesson to grow from...and finally, I sat before his podium and digested my meal.

It wasn't hard to clean out the blockage, yet it required me to take action, which is something we too often put off till tomorrow.  There's always a reason - a blockage to the free-flow of energy; there's always a reason, whether it's a gas light...or a mind.  Sometimes we can clear the blockage on our own...and other times, we may need to ask for help.  Unfortunately, it is often seen (from a cultural view) as a weakness to ask for help - we should be able to fix it on our own - yet, I believe the opposite is true; that it is the strong who are capable of asking for help when they hit a roadblock...knowing a better world exists on the other side of the problem.

I've spent a couple over-nights up to our cabin in the past week - a couple nights where I've read beneath the gas light that for over a year...didn't work.  Now it's brighter than ever - not just because of the free-flowing gas - but also because I gave it a new mantle (the old one had a couple holes in it, which decreases the brightness of the light...and allows spiders access to the light's inner workings).  And, no longer does my mind dwell upon the light I avoided fixing; no, instead it revels in the light provided by the light I fixed!

And its brightness made me realize that the other gas light on the other wall...had dimmed...because it too, had a couple small holes in the mantle. And so, yesterday I replaced that mantle as well, which will make the room a bit brighter at night during reading time...and spiders will not be able to gain access to where they don't belong...for now.

Maintenance is important - gas light maintenance...and the maintenance of our mind. This experience has made me think a bit about the webs that tend to accumulated in human minds (including my own); webs left behind by spiders that no longer exist.  I listened to a passage from the book, "The Four Agreements" recently that went something like this: "Only humans pay over and over for the same mistake - we get punished or we punish ourselves for past mistakes or transgressions every time we "think" about them - or another reminds us about them, rather than being punished just once - suffer for it just once - learn from it once...and then move on."  And isn't it the same for perceived transgressions of others against us - we hold on to them long after the lesson should have been learned; or the experiences that "hurt" us (physically or psychologically) - experiences that left such a large rock on our path that we cannot find a way around it...and we become stuck in a place void of true happiness - a place that becomes stale and unfulfilling (some would call this place Hell).  Webs without spiders serve no purpose.  Webs with no spiders need to be cleared from our mind in order to allow the energy of our life to flow freely...and joyfully.

Lessons come to awaken us, or so it seems to me - perceived problems are lessons; not something to be avoided or complained about or clung to as an excuse for the way we live our lives.  Problems arise to help us grow in wisdom - they help to spur action and help us change course when old roads no longer bring us to desired destinations.  By taking action and overcoming perceived problems we not only learn and grow, but we also allow flow to resume - taking action is the way to clear blockages.  Sometimes problems arise to help us grow - alert us to webs that have taken up residence where they serve no purpose other than to block us from the light we need.  Like the Adirondack stream with ever-flowing water - there will be rocks to flow around or over...but they don't stop the flow.  In fact, it is the water traveling over and around the rocks that makes the flow visible and audible - that makes the music we so so love to be in the Presence of...perhaps.